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Phil Lander and the Kingdom of the Golden Penis.


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#49 LBs4Me

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Posted 01 December 2008 - 03:24 AM

I had not swum for some time and had really enjoyed it as had the others . LBs4Me's date had entertained us with her rendition of of songs like "I will always love you" . I had told her she should take up singing in a Caberat which she took as a compliment . I meant that she would be miming , and think the guy lying in front of us would agree judging by the looks he was giving us. (Sorry LBs4Me but I think you know what I mean.)


LOL I know whay you mean Phil but I wouldn't swap her for the world!!

DC - I'm sorry too we didnt meet up. I think you must have sampled M's singing too - but I'm sure you agree that she has other qualities that mean we overlook her singing!!!!! :D :D
I spent all 14 days with her - as you knew I would - and I dont regret a second!!!!
Today is where your book begins, the rest is still unwritten. (Natasha Beddingfield - "Unwritten")

#50 sayang

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Posted 01 December 2008 - 05:46 AM

phil, great trip report... seeing a picture of ohm whih she is called is nice.... how was she?

#51 Macman

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Posted 01 December 2008 - 08:45 AM

Oh, man! This is really terrific. It's great to see a report with a little different spin on it. Congratulations, Phil. I enjoyed every bit of it. Felt as if I was there.

Macman
Actually living the dream.

#52 Phil Lander

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Posted 01 December 2008 - 11:41 AM

Hi guys thanks for the support , nice to know people are enjoying it.
Sayang , Ohm was really nice , very ladylike with a very nice looking pink cock. Shame I did'nt get to know her better but we did talk a bit later in the week .
DC it would have been good to meet again we could have teamed up . I did the GFE thing with an LB which I will write about next .
Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#53 Automorph

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Posted 01 December 2008 - 08:57 PM

Hey Phil:

Excellent report thus far. It's great to read about some of the non-lb related adventures, as well as those involving our favorite lifeform.

Kudos on the good and easy to read narrative. You've also given me a few ideas for my next visit!!

Cheers.

Auto
Never try and teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

#54 Phil Lander

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Posted 02 December 2008 - 12:26 PM

Nov 11

I had bumped into an LB I knew a few days earlier and had been thinking about her so decided to SMS her to see if she wanted to meet up . She replied that she would be very happy to spend some time with me so came around to the Dynasty . :D
I had promised the guys a visit to the Temple of Truth so we rounded everybody up and jumped into a Baht bus . I cant remember the cost but split between the seven of us it was just peanuts .

My LB asked me not to post her photo or name so I will respect her wishes . It is a shame as she looked lovely whether she was dressed up for a nightout or in jeans and T-shirt with no make up . I never felt shy of being with her and loved every minute of her company. 8)

I had been to the Temple of Truth before but they seemed to be calling it The Castle now . I am not sure if they have changed its name or if it was just new staff refering to it differently. There was no Dolphin show this time as there had just been a baby just born so they felt it was dangerous at that time . I bought a photo plate with my lady and myself on it . I will put it on display once my divorce is settled as she looks like a Lady. :P
Everybody seemed to enjoy the day out but it was still early so we jumped on another Baht bus and went to Jomtien Beach .

I had been to Jomtien before but had not sat on the beach as I would be bored in five minutes by myself . I bought a Bikini for my date as she did'nt know we had planned to be here.
We had an enjoyable day out and bought some music DVD's , food , drink and swum quite a bit . The two LB's with us seemed to be getting on very well and the lads did'nt have any problem with them either. I later heard that SM1 kept stealing glances at my date so I wonder if he's getting the itch. :wink: SM2 was too pre-occupied with his date to worry about anything else. :roll:

Later that night we went to a bar to set up SM1 with a real lady and then went to Hollywood Disco . As we entered they just had a DJ playing so we went to a table at the front . Part of the entry price was two free drinks each so most of us had Heineken . They also presented us with Popcorn and then had the cheek to charge us 150 baht ( funny dont remember ordering it ) . When the Band came on we were in for a surprise as it was so loud you almost had to shout in each others ears to make yourself heard . I took out my Cellphone which has a noise meter on it which measured 114 db . I'm not sure it is accurate but it felt that loud . The last time I had used it was in a Night Club in Hong Kong which was in the 80 db range . It certainly felt very loud and the lads put popcorn in their ears to muffle the sound . I tried sticking a torn up paper towel in my earholes but was unable to hear anything so just put up with the noise . I think damage occurs at over 82 db's but one night probobly wont do any permanent damage. ( I hope ) Anyway it was very entertaining with all the dancers etc , I just wish I could understand what they were singing about . Most people danced at their tables so I am wondering how easy it would be to pick someone up in there , as the crowd seemed to be mainly locals with just a few Farangs with dates.

It was the lads last night out so I hope they enjoyed it . SM2 had booked into the Sawadee Seaview so they at last had some privacy with their respective ladies .

The next morning I saw the lads off and SM1 said that this had been the best holiday that he had ever had and gave me a surprising hug . :shock: I think SM2 enjoyed it too as he plans to come back asap to see his lady friend . I must get that copy of "Private Dancer" to him.

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Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#55 triat45

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Posted 02 December 2008 - 08:59 PM

'the castle" is the "Sanctuary of Truth" , in their brochures and on most tourist maps.

I was there with my ti rak late October - amazing bit of construction work but, unfortunately, already suffering from the ravages of its location :(
Triat

#56 Phil Lander

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Posted 03 December 2008 - 07:57 AM

'the castle" is the "Sanctuary of Truth" , in their brochures and on most tourist maps.

I was there with my ti rak late October - amazing bit of construction work but, unfortunately, already suffering from the ravages of its location :(


Yes I know , I have two brochures from two visits , so why are the guides so inconsistant in how they refer to it? :?

I'm guessing that Thai's would always refer to it as a Temple no matter what its supposed to be called . The Baht bus driver knew where to go to when I asked about the Temple of Truth.
Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#57 Phil Lander

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Posted 03 December 2008 - 03:39 PM

Nov 12 afternoon

I had wanted to check out Pooks Swan bar and my LB was also interested . I think we had heard that the girls would be dressed for Loy Kratong and they did'nt dissappoint . We found the bar easily due to the photos posted here by another member 8) LBs4Me and his date followed us soon after we arrived .
We spent some time chatting to the LB's all decked out in their costumes . The cops stopped and warned them about showing too much leg as it was disrespectful towards the custom. I got to know Lee quite well as I had talked to her in January . I had never Barfined her but seriously thought about it as she is very lovely . My date did not mind me flirting so it was a good afternoon . I think LBs4Me got to know somebody too but I will let him talk about that :wink:

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Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#58 Phil Lander

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Posted 03 December 2008 - 03:58 PM

I cannot remember what happened between the afternoon and evening but after a meal in The Sportsman we all ended up back in Pooks where I again meet up with Lee . I was really liking her but felt that I wanted to save my power for my date. :wink: I was also getting interested in some of the other LB's in there but could'nt do anything about it. :(
Later we went to the beach where we bought some Loy Kratong baskets and paid a young lad to take them out in the sea for us . We were supposed to make a wish as the baskets went out so I said one for my date. She said she that this is the most romantic night of the year and was glad she was with me. :oops:
It was very windy that night so quite a few baskets ended up back on shore so we walked away before that happened and went to Jenny Star Bar .
I'm not really fond of the place and they really pissed us around with paying for the drinks so I was not very pleased . I was wondering if they expected us to walk away with out getting our change.
I saw quite a few familiar faces like Paris , Noon , Pui , Moo I think and others who's faces I knew but could'nt remember their names .
Noon looked very sweet and sexy but as nutty as a fruit cake as my mum would probobly say . :roll:
I had a word with Pui about a mutual friend who she informed me that she was'nt working anymore . :( She also had no recollection of the falling out we had on several nights in January so we shared a drink and had a laugh . She's definately not my type but I am glad we can be friends.

None of my photos came out very well that night so I cant post anything other than the Walking street sign to show how busy it was .

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Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#59 Phil Lander

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Posted 03 December 2008 - 04:23 PM

Nov 13

Went down to reception and spent some time with LBs4Me and his lady before they left for Bangkok . :( We went for a walk and breakfast near Pooks so I grabbed a photo . We also got shouted at and waved at by Aum ( ex 131 and Litas) who knew both me and my Lady (wheres she working now?) . Then went shopping in the Park Avenue complex which is nice but theres not really much in there in comparisson with some of the Malls , so we went to Big C and Mikes .

Later on went to the Green Bottle which is one of my favorites along with the Sportsman and Molly Malones . They have a singer who does some old classics but does not seem to know all the words or to be able to hold a tune for long. :roll:

After that went to Malibu Caberat and had a chat with one of the LB's who seemed to remember me from January and who had also had seen my lady around before . When Elvis came on and sung Wooden Heart I nearly shed a tear as I looked at my lady :oops: Now this was getting a bit serious . I was thinking of making an exit at some stage but I really was enjoying her company still so intended to keep her on . (The quiet period was about to start for the Kings Sisters Funeral). I tried to get a nice picture of Tina but am unsure if that is possible. :P

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Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.

#60 Phil Lander

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Posted 03 December 2008 - 04:58 PM

Nov 13 continued

Went to the second road Beer Bar to see June , Doris and watch a bit of the LB show . No-one questioned either myself or my date as to her being an LB or really seemed bothered about it .

We then went to the Family Bar in Naklua as my LB had not been there and was interested in my stories so wanted to go .
As I walked in first I was immediately spotted by Luk who seemed very pleased to see me , but then looked disappointed when she saw I had a friend with me already . :(
She made a real effort to be nice to me so I had an LB either side of me making me feel very happy as they were getting on very well too. Luk would keep whispering in my ear for me to go to her room for a ST but I declined as I felt like drinking . I had gotten into the habit of having afternoon sex and drinking at night as I had a GFE it seemed to work out well. :D
Things got a bit out of hand and I ended up flirting with some of the GG's as well as the LB's . I got one in trouble as she was ignoring a customer who wanted to BF her but she was flirting with me too much :shock: Even a dog made an appearence so I had to get some photos of that for SM and SM1's benefit ( lady with dog show :wink: ) I also bought a bottle of whiskey for the girls behind the bar but they kept giving me shooters . :shock: At some stage I turned to my lady and said that we had to go now. She was really surprised as I looked normal and we had'nt had a fight or anything . We grabbed a bike to get to the hotel but as soon as I walked into the room I went straight for the toilet and chucked three times :oops: . My lady said I looked as normal as if I were sober so she was really surprised that I was that drunk . Its not the first time someone has told me that . :roll:

Attached Files


Phil Lander by name Phillanderer by nature.
The World is my Oyster - Muwhahahahaha!!
A Ladyboy is never early , neither is she ever late . She turns up precisely when she means to.




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