788 replies to this topic

[Legend]

sounds like word has got round, there is a rich yank in town.
be careful man, hide it all in your sock.

[thailover57]

Scary update Mac. Be careful, please.

[Macman]

Thanks, guys. I will be careful. Previously on my walks, I used to go exploring different little side streets and neighborhoods. I'm sticking to the main streets now, although I'm not sure how much good that will do because I've been told that nobody here will stop and help if you're being attacked, as I mentioned in an earlier post. The good news is that there seems to be more and more foreigners here lately, reducing my kidnapping odds and making me stand out a little less.

On a much happier note, the relationship between Angel and me is growing stronger. Without going into personal details too much, there are many indicators that her feelings for me are real and not based on what some cynics might think. Having been a BM for quite a while, I am well aware of what often occurs in these situations and so I always have my radar up, even when I don't want to do so. Every indicator is positive, and we are both enjoying our new life.

I think I mentioned that one of Angel's friends has been staying with us off and on. She's a ladyboy who can't live as one openly because she's a nurse. It is such a pleasure to have her with us. She has an outrageous sense of humor and a great personality. Yesterday, when I returned from golf, she was awake and Angel was still sleeping. She said that she wanted to try and make pancakes for the first time. I agreed, and she did a pretty good job. She was making some extras, and I asked why. She said they were for Angel. I protested that they would grow cold by the time Angel got up. She said that she was going to wake her, and serve her breakfast in bed. So we made up a plate and a glass of milk and went into the room. She awakened Angel by singing out merrily, "Happy Mother's Day!"

I've got a line on 2 vehicles. One is a Honda CRV. It's a 2003 model but it's in pristine condition with only 70,000 Kilometers on it (about 44,000 miles). I know the owner well. The other is a 2009 Mitsubishi Adventure. I'll let you know.

[Macman]

Well, I finally bit the bullet and bought a vehicle. I really wanted the 2-year-old Mitsubishi Adventure because it made more sense even though I liked the CRV, but the guy wound up selling to his brother. I bought the 2003 Honda CRV for a price I'm embarrassed to disclose. I guess the Adventure models are assembled here, and so are relatively inexpensive. Some Toyota models (like the Innova) are also fairly cheap, and I had a chance to buy my friend's son-in-law's 2010 model, but it's way too big for my needs. All thge other cars are outrageously priced. Anyway, it's done. Angel is thrilled because it's red with black and red leather seats (she goes nuts for anything red).

[petesie]

Safe driving mate!

My PI GF tells me they are crazy there but not so much so in the provinces, take care of 21 foot crocs crossing the road!

[Surin Nix]

Congrats on the new wheels, Mac. I know transportation has been a bit of a sticking point the last few months, and so the newfound liberty should be a welcome relief.

Safe driving......and should you be kidnapped, can I have your car?

[Macman]

Thanks, Petesie and Nix. Nix, no you can't because Angel will get it, as you'll see as part of my rant below.

Okay, I'm sorry, but I have to play the ugly, spoiled, complaining American for a while. I try not to do so, but it's sometimes impossible. Some things just defy logic. I don't think it's a case of not seeing things from another culture's standpoint.

Because of all the crime here lately, and because I'm now driving, I figured that I'd better take care of Angel in case something happens to me. (Easy now, cynics. It was my idea, and it makes sense.) I go to my friend's lawyer and tell him that I want a will of sorts. If I die here, I want Angel to get the car (sorry, Nix) and whatever monies I have in any Philippine banks. Before you arrive at the conclusion that I'm nuts, keep in mind that I won't be keeping a lot of money here. The bulk of my money will be kept in the U.S. and what the heck would any one at home do with the car if I died. The lawyer tells me that it won't be a will, but some sort of donor thing. He insisted on putting all kinds of standard crap in there about, "if the donee shall have no more love or affection with the donor or vice versa than the present donation will likewise be rescinded and of no further force and effect." I get it, but I told it wasn't necessary because I would be going back to the States if we broke up, and taking my money. If we were on friendly terms, I'd give her the car and some money to get on her feet. If not, I'd sell it. Anyway, that's not the dumb part. I mentioned that I wanted him to phrase it as any and all bank accounts in The Philippines because I wanted to have a few because of the recent failure of LBC Bank here. The PDIC (Philippine Deposit Insurance Corp.) only insured up to PHP 500,000 (about US $12,000). He then said, "Oh, well, you understand that my fee for drawing up this legal document is based on the value of the donation. I guess we will have to assume that we're dealing with at least PHP 1,500,000 if you're talking about exceeding the insured amount in various banks, plus the value of the motor vehicle. My fee is 1%, or PHP 15,000. Is that okay with you." Oh, sure it is, 'cause I'm a friggin' moron. FFS, NO!! I then said that I wasn't sure what I would be having here, but that I only have PHP 300,000 in the bank now (after paying for the CRV), plus the present sale price of the Honda. (I have more than that. haha.) "Oh," he said. "So my fee will be PHP 8,200. Let's round it to PHP 8,000. Okay." Yeah, sure. Why not? I then made sure that I wouldn't be charged if my holdings here went up. No, I wouldn't. This is final. Shit, I could have told him that I have PHP 100 in the bank, and paid 1 peso to him (plus 1% of the car). Now, listen to this. The seller of the Honda was paying for the documentation on the transfer of ownership. My other friend was handling that for him because of his "in"with this lawyer. It turns out that attorney's fee for the simple, standard legal form of transferring ownership of the vehicle is also based on the value of the car. In this case he was only charging my friend 1/2 of 1% as a favor to him. Are they f***in' nuts? If the car was a Lamborghini, which sells for about PHP 19 million here, his friggin' fee would have been PHP 190,000 (about $4,500) ffs. If I had an estate of $2,000,000 to leave Angel, I'd have to pay him $20,000 to draw up a will. OMG. Also, Angel had to go there and sign 5 copies of the document, agreeing to accept the "donation" I was making. You can't make this stuff up.

I know I'm going on and on, but this is a rant, and that's what they do. Next issue - the police. Last weekend, at about 3:00 AM, one block from the police station, six shots were fired around by some lunatic. The police say they never heard the shots. A number of people called the station right after the incident to report it. No answer. The police later said that the phone was broken. I'm not making this up. The local paper had a lot more to say about our defenders, but I'm getting spent from raving. By the way, most of the robberies and car break-ins are occurring in the square one block from the police station, and also included a man shot to death while running to the station for help. No arrest was made.

Final bitch - karaoke. You have to understand something. I love karaoke. I speak Japanese, and am fascinated by the culture. I had a simple karaoke machine almost 30 years ago, long before most Americans even heard about it. I had to get up at 4:15 AM for golf, but unfortunately for me, one of our neighbor's had a birthday. I am not exaggerating when I tell you that the noise could be heard for many blocks. Lucky me, we're only about 100 yards from them. It would have been bad enough if it had been Beyonce singing that loud and that late, but we're talking karaoke here, so just about everybody sucked. This is not the first time this has happened, and this is a relatively quiet neighborhood. I fell asleep after midnight, and it was still going. I was so pissed off, I woke up at 2:15 and couldn't get back to sleep. Angel tried explaining the logic of it to me, even as I kept asking why it had to be so damn loud. She said that when her birthday comes around in March, she wants everyone to share in it. (I told her that I may have an appointment that night; somewhere; anywhere.) I also told her that in New York, the cops would have been called after a half hour of it, and they would have come, no matter how rich or influential the people were.

Alright, let me end on a happier note. The seller of the CRV was the wife of one of my golf partners, one of the nicest people I've met here. He was the one whose birthday party I attended. If you remember, I didn't bring Angel with me then, because my other buddies thought it was just for his golf mates. I still wasn't sure how he and his wife would react to her. Well, we met for coffee and snacks around 5:00 PM yesterday. He and his wife could not have been nicer. Angel and the wife hit it off right away. In fact, they went off together to do some food shopping while we chatted. We've decided to meet once a month for dinner.

[Crackerjax]

Funny rant Mac. At least you're learning how to play the game! Might want to push back the purchase of the Lamborgini - at least till they re-pave the road near the police station.

I love the little streetside videoke joints u find in AC - are they common all over the Phils? Buy a few drinks, fire up the karaoke machine, and presto! - the bar quickly clears of any other customers. Or maybe that's just when a bunch of ladyboys and mongerers are working the mic.

[Macman]

I don't remember seeing any of those streetside ones here, CJ, although an awful lot of people seem to have their own karaoke and videoke machines. I think the instruction manual specifies that you must turn the volume to the maximum level or your warranty is voided.

[Legend]

excellent post mac,
i do enjoy your stories about the stuff they dont tell you in the brochure.

[Macman]

PT, honestly I don't think the lawyer was trying to shaft me. I think that's the idiotic way things are done here. I mean, think about it, he then took my word for it as to how much money was available here in The Philippines, and based his fee on it. No mention of an amount was made in the legal document, so I won't have a problem with it. Also, the locals pay that ridiculous 1% of the sale value for a simple transfer of ownership. Wow, you really do love horse racing. Maybe one day we'll meet up in Saratoga.

Thanks, Ant. Honest to God, some of the stuff about the police here is scary. The locals say that you don't have to call the cops when there's a crime. They're already there; as the perpetrators. That's just a joke, but they all insist that the police have a habit of showing up long after the crime. As the columnist here says, "They are interested in solving crimes, but not preventing them." One guy swears that he called the police for assistance, and was told that they couldn't come because they had no gas for their car. He may have been kidding, but I don't think so.