199 replies to this topic

[paultain]

Cheers Paul.........brilliant song and excellent video....... :wink:

Yon Jacko fella has escaped the madhouse last seen overnighting in Dubai on his way to the LoS................

Ha, then news like that is good to hear, lucky sod....... you must be on a countdown also?

[petesie]

Oh aye.........4 weeks or so..........not that I'm counting......

[paultain]

Day 15

Got up early, and decided to take it easy with the old funds today, so we headed to the ferry to Kho Larn, which Sem sat there in tears again, as she is a real rice farmer, and land lover, and sitting on that boat with all that water all around, she couldn’t wait to get off and on to dry land again. Did my usual stunt by going to my favorite beach, ordered a nice meal and relaxed for most of the day.

Then called in on Crazy John, on the way back to the ferry, and had a few beers and good crack with him for a couple of hours. Then took the last ferry back to Patt’s, where we hoped on the bike and when for dinner, at the Silver Dollar, then had an early night in, sitting outside the loom and talked all night.

Day 16

The usual routine in the morning before heading up the highway again too another place I earmarked previously.
http://www.elephant-...ge-pattaya.com/

Now I thought it was just an elephant show, which lasts one and half hours, demonstrates bathing, training and forestry skills of the elephants, concluding with the “Glong Sabad Chai” ceremony. The show commences at 14.30 hrs and the price is 650 Baht per person. I thought I would just do that, until I saw the other thing’s they had there.

I had these choices;

Elephant trekking 1
This consists of an elephant back trek for 1 hour, through undeveloped rural areas passed the pineapples, tapiocas, rubber plantations passed the silk house, the rice field and return to the elephant village for fruits in season, coffee or tea. The cost is 1,000 baht - per person.

Elephant trekking 2
The same as the above, with addition of getting picked up at the rubber plantation by a four wheel drive Land Rover to be driven to the Silk House for a short visit. Here you will be able to briefly witness the cultivation and processing of raw silk and see silk threats being weaved on a traditional hand loom, and then be driven back to the elephant village to enjoy complimentary fruits in season, coffee or tea. The costs for elephant trekking with Land Rover is 1,200 baht - per person.

The Combination Trekking
This lasts about three and half-hours and begins with a one hour elephant trek. This is followed by visit to the Silk House, a 30-minute jungle walk and then 30 minutes of rafting across a nearby lake. This is followed by an Ox-cart ride, and concludes with a buffet lunch or dinner. This trek takes place twice daily at 10.30 and 16.00 hrs. The price is 2,000 Baht per person.

At first I thought it was a little bit pricy, but it included pick-up and drop-off at the hotel, but never the less I took the combination package, so we could do it all so to speak, in one shoot. Looking back on it I realized it was pretty fair value, for what you got for the money. And to top that, as we were finished, the show was still going on, and passing it, one of the staff asked us did we want to see it, which I jokingly responded, I already spent 4,000 baht, (but with a discount as we didn’t get picked up at the hotel) and the show was too dear, and knowing this the staff thought it would be nice to finish off the day, watching the rest of the show for free, which was another hour.

So all in all, we where there 5-6 hours, and it was a great day out, and I would do it again. But thank fuck I took it easy with the funds the day before. Early evening we passed Sem’s bar, so we stopped to pay the bar-fine, and I sat on the bike waiting with no intentions of going in. But there was two guys sitting at the bar, and asked the band to play, ‘Sweet home Alabama’, jesus was it rough. Don’t get me wrong the band was a really good band, but the young lead guitarist hadn’t a clue, and I reckoned he barely hear of the song before, but the bass guitarist was old school, and sang it pretty good, and played the bass, with all the right style and notes just like it should be played.

So I’m sitting there on the bike listening to this kid on the guitar, which was like being in the dentist chair, listening to the drill plowing through the nerves of my teeth, and I was telling myself not to get involved. But fuck it I had enough of the kid fucking up a good song, so I dismounted and went in, and interrupted them, and took the kid to the side, took his guitar off him, and started to show him real slow the three lead rifts that was the basis of the whole song. And wile doing that, I thought fuck I’ll have a beer while I’m here.

The two guys that requested the song, noticed the notes I was playing too the kid, and shouted over, “Fuck showing him, you play it!”, and so did the bass guitarist. So as the guitar was already in my hand, we regrouped and started it off again, but this time properly, which ended up pretty good. A couple more customers came in, and after I finished that song, I had the four of them shouting up requests, and at the same time sending me over a shit load of beer.

So I played for 20 minutes, then sat down to 6 beers in front of me, and I had drank 2 wile I was playing. Well that knocked out the idea of a quite night in, the four guys invited me over, and we had a right old session, with me popping up to play the odd song. So I stayed there for the rest of the night, which pleased Sem, who was with her mate that we took for a three-som a few nights before.

Later on I gave them both money to go and eat, and just before midnight Sem asked me could we take her mate back with us again, telling me she only had a couple of offs that month, and needed the money. I said to Sem I think I spent a little too much today, Sem told me she told her mate that, but she only wanted 500 baht for LT. Well what could I do, I had to help the poor girl out. So at the end of the night the 3 of us went back to the hotel, and as we were all good friends now, it was a better session than the first time.

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[paultain]

Day 17

Next morning the three of us went for breakfast, and then Sem’s mate went back to her room. I told Sem a few days before that the last day I only wanted to take a LB, and she would have to go back to her bar that last night, but as she was showing a bit of feeling for me, I decided not to go that way. She wasn’t sure what day I was leaving, so over breakfast I told her I had to book with ‘Mr.T’, a taxi to the airport for the next day. “Oh! You’re going back tomorrow? .......... so I have to go back to the bar tonight?”………. “No, no! I stay with you the last day”. I went alone and booked it for the following day, as I though it was best to let her think, I was spending the last day with her, other than her sadly sitting at her bar, thinking about me shagging a LB, for my last night.

So I was going to take it easy today, then Sem ask me, “Paul could you do one last thing for me?” ………….. “What is it Sem?” …….. “Could you buy me a TV, for my room?”……. “Ya fucking what? ……… sure I haven’t got the money for a TV!” ……. “No, no Paul! ….. Only a small second hand one, about 2000 baht!” So I thought about it, and had an idea she was going to stay in her room for a day or two, and not go back to the bar right away, and besides that she had her aunt and kids living in the same apartment block, bored stiff waiting for her husband to come back from work every evening, so I thought it would be a good idea to get them one, if I could find one in that price range. After all it would bring a little spark into their lives, wile staying in Pattaya.

So we spent the whole afternoon driving around Pattaya and Naklua, looking in all the second hand shops, for a decent TV for a good price, and managed to get one after a bit of haggling. And then took it to her room, to the delight of the rest of her family. Then took half of her belongings from the hotel and dropped them off in her room also, so there wouldn’t be too much of her stuff to take back the next day.

That evening we just had a quite drink at John’s bar in Soi 7, and had to bullshit it was my last night, and I was saying my last farewell. But as soon as she went to the toilet I put John right about it, and he just played along. Then back to the hotel for an early night, and the last session with Sem.

[onetruesaxon]

Paul your TR'S just get better and better ! Buying the TV for her was a great gesture.

[paultain]

Paul your TR'S just get better and better ! Buying the TV for her was a great gesture.

Cheers saxon,

The way I looked at it ......... some people would pay that just for a shag ......... I think it was money well spent, but it was a pity she didn't ask me sooner, then I might have spent more and got a better one, before the funds started to run low.

[paultain]

Day 18

Woke up early, but Sem decided to have a good long last session, as she wasn’t going to see me again. And thought I was on my way to the airport that afternoon. Had breakfast around 11am, and then Sem packed up the rest of her things, and I took her back to her room. Although Sem was hardened to this, you could see she was a bit upset, but tried not to show it, when we said our last goodbye, out side her apartment block. I drove off and tried not to dwell on it, as I didn’t want it to spoil my last evening.

Drove around a bit, working out a plan of action for the evening, but avoiding Soi 2 just in case she might be there. As I was in and out of Naklua the last couple of days, I put the VIP complex at the top of my list. Then went back to the hotel to get ready for the evening, to find a love letter on my pillow from Sem. There was enough in it to make you want to go back to her bar that night, saying you made a mistake on the flight date, but sure what good would that do, as all your doing is prolonging the inevitable for just one more day.

So I went to have a snack at the Canterbury Tales around 3pm, I didn’t want to eat too much, as I wanted to leave plenty of room for the beer, on my last piss up tonight. So I just ordered a club sandwich, some chips, and a mug of tea. I sat with Dave the owner, and had a good old yarn, and when the meal came it was way too much, but started to pick at it. Then walks this guy with a very familiar face, and Dave introduced him as Paul, that has been living in Pattaya for over 3 years. I asked him did he have a business of some sort, to which he replied, he was a police volunteer.

Then it hit me right away, “Wait a minute! ……… you’re that fucking twat that pepper sprayed the LB, on the beach road a wile back!”……… “Oh you heard about that?” …… “There’s a lot of people want to string you up and skin you alive……… including me mate!” But I calmly let him sit down and tell me his side of the story, as there are two sides to every thing. Now his side of the story wasn’t the same as reported in the media. The media fail to include that the LB’s where actually beating up the girl on the beach, when he tried to stop it, and as he was in civvies, they thought he was just another tourist passing by, that happened to butt in on their business, so they had a go at him, leaving him to defend himself with the pepper spray he had, that he only bought an hour before for 300 baht, so he was not carrying it around with him on purpose.

He further told me that the reporter who did the story was a farang freelancer from Bangkok, that didn’t work for any reputable company, and had a bad habit of twisting the truth, (which was confirmed by Dave and other owners I asked that night) sensationalizing the story, to get it published, so he could make ends meet. The media went for it ……… well there’s nothing new there about the media these days.

I took the piss out of him for running home to get his Boy Scout uniform on. But he told me he had to start work at 9pm, and when the normal cop turned up to calm everybody down, and knowing him, let him go home to change for work. But the LB’s still thinking he was a tourist, thought it was a good idea to swindle 30k out of him, by going down and making the complaint. So he was call back to the station in his uniform as he had already changed into for work.

He just got his hand slapped for being a bit heavy handed, but no more than that, and if he was way out of line, believe me, he would have got more that a hand slap. He was more pissed off on loosing 300 baht on a defective can, because as he pulled it out, and held it firmly in his hand above his head, the can kind of exploded, and crushed in his hand, and he got all the shit in his hand, all down his arm and shirt, and nobody got sprayed in the first place, and another reason why he was quickly let home to shower and change. And when I think back at the report and the media video, it did show a crushed can in the gutter, and the so called sprayed LB’s, rabbiting on in the camera, shortly after getting sprayed, seemed to show no symptoms of that, not even a red eye. So that was his side of the story.

It turn out he was a very nice and funny guy, that didn’t give a shit about what people said about him, in fact the more they talk the better he feels, and loves it. I shared my meal with him, instead of letting it go to waste, and then I told Paul and Dave up front about me and LB’s, to which there was nothing only a ‘up to you’ reaction. And I still tried to get them going by asking them what did they have against LB’s, Boy Scout Paul turned around and said, “I got nothing against them! ……… as a mater of fact I have shagged a few, and I don’t give a fuck what any one thinks………… any farang that lives here and tells you he hasn’t and would never fuck a LB, is a liar……… isn’t that right Dave?”. Dave just put his head down, and whispered, “The wife’s in the back and can hear every word”. Mmmmmmmmm nuff said.

Boy Scout Paul then proceeded to rhyme off some of his encounters with the dark side, which were quite funny, all the wile wolf whistling the best LB who was darting in and out of the LB bar across the road, but not knowing it was one, or even knowing about the bar saying, “Look at that ….now that is nice”. I had to laugh at Dave when he said to him, “What her over there? ……… that’s a geezer!” Then quickly turning to me and said, “No disrespect Paul, its just I am from that part of the country that call every one geezers, and it’s just a bad habit I can’t break”…………. “Oh no problem Dave I know what you mean”. Boy Scout Paul interrupted, “Well I don’t give a fuck what it is……. I would fuck her without batting an eye”. And then carried on wolf whistling, to get her attention.

We sat there until 6pm, but Dave usually closes at 4 pm, but it was good crack over a few mugs of tea. All the wile I was taking the piss out of the ‘Walking Street Boy Scout Troop’, and how useless they must be, but Boy Scout Paul, did give me good insight and some good examples, of how they can come in handy. I pushed it more by saying, “I hear they are going to let you twats have guns ……… for fuck sake Paul, you’ll end up shooting yourself……… look at you……. You can’t even handle a pepper spray, never mind a gun”…………….. “And what is it with these black shirts? ........... Do you think you’re the SS?”

Boy Scout Paul then said, that the guns would never happen, and because of the bad publicity (ie; him), they had or they were going to change the shirts. And they both told me about the big fella with the tatoo’s……. now he does think he’s a ‘Storm Trooper’, and told me a little about his background, and he sounds like a mental case. All in all in was a nice afternoon, with the both of them.

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[paultain]

Day 18 part 2

We all parted just after 6pm, so I rode the bike around for a bit, watching the bars filling up with staff to start their evening shift, that way I could see what was available before the punters bar-fined the best. Around 7pm, I took a quick look in drinking street, but there was nothing there again, so I went on to the VIP complex in Naklua.

This time I sat outside, at one of the family beer bars, where there were around 4 young and very cute LB’s, that I had never saw before the first time I came. I had one on ether side of me, plus one in the bar in front of me, so I got the three of them a drink, and we had a good laugh. The music was a bit loud as I was sitting under the speakers, but the DJ saw me looking at the speakers with a frown, and asked me was it too loud and turned it down to a more mellow volume.

The two cuties decided to sing (mime) me a slow Thai love song and asked the DJ to play it, then took turns on the little stage of the dancing pole, and mimed the song to me as if they were doing a number at the Alcazar cabaret. I remembered the song from way back in the 80’s, and the story behind it. So when they finished and sat down again, I told them I knew the song, but they were having none of it. All though you would think it was a female voice, I told them it was a LB that was singing, and it was a very famous song from the late 70’s – early 80’s, and this blew them away.

I went on and told them that the LB worked in Alcazar, but could sing as good as if not better than the most famous female singers in Thailand, and through her singing, became the most famous LB in Thailand, and still to this day. Unfortunately, the song they were singing was her last, which was all about being broken hearted and wanting to die. It was because of her rich boyfriend fucked her off, because of the taboo, and she committed suicide shortly after recording the record. I remember the song being played in all the bars for months, which changed the Thai people’s attitude towards LB’s, making them realize that LB’s are people also.

After I finished my yarn, the two cuties would have followed me to hell and back, but I ear marked them for later, then moved on. I remembered I haven’t been to Pookswan yet, so I drove directly too there, parked the bike and sat down and ordered a beer. Some older LB with tattoos, who was new, kept on pestering me. So I ignored her and watched the girls dancing. I noticed they took the wall away that divided the inside bar from the outside bar, which a few bars did, because of the smoking law, making the whole place a smoking area.

Martin was now in the upstairs bar in Soi 6, so Dave (Pooks man) was taking care of business instead, and was sitting at the inside bar with Hennie from Norway, and sitting beside Hennie was a real cute young thing that caught my eye, but I thought she was with Hennie, but I kept on looking that direction, and Dave was looking back at me, but didn’t recognize me. Then Boa was on the pole but constantly giving me the eye, so I gave her a smile and a wink, and went for a piss, where I bumped into Dave.

“That’s right! That’s right!...... don’t talk to your mates, ya ignorant twat!” ……… “Oh Paul I didn’t realize it was you……… I was wondering what is that guy staring at!” …….. “Do you really think I’d be wasting my time staring at an ugly fucker like your self? ……… I was looking at that cutie sitting with Hennie” …… “Fuck sake Paul don’t be sitting on your own, and come and join us!” So the three of us got stuck into shots of sambuka and Tabasco sauce.

I noticed Boa was going around the pole circuit again, so I thought to my self fuck it I’ll pay the bar for her, and asked one of the girls to tell her to come down and have rest and a drink Before I paid her bar-fine, I had to confirm with Dave, what was happening with Pancake (one I spent the whole vacation with the year before). Dave told me she wasn’t working for them for a few months, but she pops in from time to time, and was in the night before.

Knowing Boa was into three-soms, I first said to her I would pay her bar-fine, but how much did she want for LT, and without batting an eye she said 1000 baht, right away. Well I thought, that’s about right, and said I wanted a three-som tonight, so pick another that she liked. Boa looked around and picked the cutie that was sitting with Hennie, and I told her she was with some one already. Boa had words with her and found out she wasn’t, so I confirmed it with Hennie, and asked him did he mind me taking her also, or was he contemplating on taking her later. Hennie told me he just got her one drink, and for me to carry on with his blessing.

If I knew that I might of just took her, who was called ‘Tok’, and was 19, with a cuddly personality the same as Sony. But fuck it, this is my last night, and I might as well go the whole hog. After a load of shots, I made a move and paid the bill along with the two bar-fines, and told the two girls we had to go a few places, to say goodbye, as it was my last night. So the two girls got on Boa’s bike and started to follow me.

First stop was Noi’s bar, where we had a few drinks and listened to some music. Noi’s widow had a good long chat with the girls, and when we made a move to leave, they got up and pinned some money to the tree, for Noi’s Buddha, which I thought was nice of them, as they didn’t know Noi, or had never been to the bar before.

The next stop was the Irish bar in Soi 7, where we had a few drinks and I said my farewell to the owner and cashier. Then hopped over next door to John, but first telling Boa and Tok to have a few games of pool, and order what ever and when ever they wanted, so they won’t get bored wile I talk to the lads. After a few drinks, they stopped playing pool, and came over to the bar, that’s when Boa and I realized we met a couple of weeks before at the same bar, when she was with Aussieguy. And I remember him being pissed off with someone, but I didn’t realize it was Boa.

Said farewell to John, and headed for the last stop, the EZY. So the three of us piled in there, were Karl was sitting at the bar as usual, and played some of my favorite songs, then introduced me to ‘Juri’, which was the first time meeting him. Another really nice guy, and we had a few drinks, and I had to laugh when Boa, who had never met him before, hear his name and said, “Your name ‘Juri’?”……… “Yes”……….. “Aaahhh Big cock naa!”. Juri’s face went red as he started to explain he only had a normal size cock, but at the same time, realizing he had a bit of a reputation, in the LB telegraph system.

So around 3am we all headed back to the hotel, were we had a hell of a session. I realized even more about Tok, that she was one I would taken for a few days, she was more my type of girl.

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[paultain]

Day 19 the last day

We must have had a session for hours, as we didn’t wake up until 3pm. It was too late for them to go to work, as their salary would be cut, so they just took the day off instead. I asked them where did they want to go to eat, and that’s when they told me they all prefer to eat in the little bamboo shack across the road facing the Pookswan, so we went there, and sure enough the food was good.

After that, I took them bowling for a couple of hours, then I started to think, what am I doing bowling, when I could be having a shag in my last few hours, as the taxi was picking me up at 10pm. So I told them I was off to get my last piece of pussy before I go, so they gave me an understandable kiss, and I left them there, around 7pm, and shot up to Soi 6, and went into one bar, but there was nothing that tickled my fancy, then went into the full moon bar, where I had a cute young thing that couldn’t speak English, and realizing she was just a newbie, and was probably a lousy shag, I said I couldn’t speak Thai, so that got rid of her, as I wanted a dirty bitch with plenty of experience.

Then in walks Suzy with a real fit body, and as I was running out of time, and couldn’t pick and choose, I just settled with her, and went up stairs. Well it turned out to be a good choice, as she was great, and business must have been real slow, as all she kept saying was to take my time we had plenty of time, and didn’t seem to bother about how long I stayed up there, or how many times I wanted to fuck her. And I don’t know if it was a mental thing, but when I came in doggie style, I just couldn’t stop cumming, and the orgasm seemed to go on for ages, and was fucking great.

Just about got back to the hotel at 9pm, and handed in the keys to the bike, which should have been handed in at 1pm earlier that afternoon, and thought I would have to pay some more, but the receptionist said no I didn’t have to pay any extra. Then I gave the two maids, the receptionist, the security guy, and the night bell hop, all 100 baht tip each. And went across the road to Robins Rest-aurant and had a great plate of fish n’ chips, bread and butter, and a big mug of tea. And waited there for the taxi, which came at 10pm sharp.

24 hours later I was back in my apartment, switching the power back on, and checking my e-mails, and noticed I was invited to another party, in a private villa, on the day I left, by another BM. Thank you very much for that. But I had a shit load of angry e-mails from Pancake all of a sudden, and judging by the contents of them, it seems that Boa dropped me right in it, even every single detail of what went on in the bedroom.

I sent her a good long answer back, telling her I looked for her but she was nowhere to be found. And I thought she had a boyfriend now, and it was her own fault for not keeping in contact with me, like she use to do until about 4 months after I left her there. I was getting more and more mail from her, Boa said this, Boa said that. I just couldn’t be bother answering them, until she cooled down, then the e-mail got all, I love you, I miss you, god give me a break.

Well that’s the end of the yarns for this trip, thank fuck…….. now I can get back to the book.

Cheers lads

[petesie]

Wahoo!............what a ride..............brilliant stuff Paul and a bloody shame it has to come to a temporary closure till the next time yon baldy dome hits the mean streets.......... :wink:

Bua was true to form then.......what a surprise.........worra bitch.......

[zokk]

great report, thanks Paul, a heap of useful information that I'll be using in a couple of months.

[paultain]

Wahoo!............what a ride..............brilliant stuff Paul and a bloody shame it has to come to a temporary closure till the next time yon baldy dome hits the mean streets.......... :wink:

Bua was true to form then.......what a surprise.........worra bitch.......

That was the best time I had in a few years, and for the first time I was sorry to leave, normally I just mope about for the last two days and couldn't wait to get home. I don't know what it was this time, as it seemed to be the usual for me, but it must have been getting around easier on the bike and being a little more adventurous.

As for Boa....... well I told Pancake to tell her she's getting a smack in the mouth the next time I see her. So any shit I have read about her on other threads, I would have to agree with them. One thing I forgot to mention, I did ask Boa about Pancake, and she told me Pancake was freelancing, working by the phone and internet, and getting punters that way. And in bed that girls body was red hot, and I mean that temperature wise. She felt like she had a 105 fever, but she didn't feel it, and didn't bother her. I was thinking 'trust me to get the pig flu on my last day

I think you know about that 'Boy Scout Paul', and the commotion it caused on TLF. What do you think of the guy now, and his side of the story? I bet you recognize him in my photo, that it is the same guy.