38 replies to this topic

[thailover57]

I'll own up to being a stupid part-time visitor newbie 10 years ago. The light lit up when I got an email from her new European boyfriend saying he was in love with her and taking her home to marry. I wished him luck and smartened up. Got out cheaply and happy.

[Gilly123]

An Update On my posts if anyone ma be interested

 

Well i've managed to aquire some time off work before 2016

and will be returning to pattaya in 5 months,after letting my LB friend know she contacted me to say she would like to stay with me for the 14 days i will be there. and has decided not to work whilst i am there.after mailing her back and asking politely how much the 14 days were going to cost me !!!!!!

The reply was you paying for hotel and eat..i not want money you give only 14 days pay from work..

3000baht....

So that's stumped me a little.... needless to say i have not given an answer yet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Torques Hit]

There are probably 2 ways to view this and it will all depend which view you believe, if it is a concern for you then just suggest that she still work while your there. Before you judge her on this statement remember she just might be supporting her family. You can always ask her why ? But if you fear the answer then don't ask the question. 3,000 Baht for 2 weeks is nothing. Good luck.

[mikel1]

That's a great price. Of course there'll be extras. I paid a girl 10k for six days last October in bkk. Mind you it was a great six days!

[Spyder Rocket]

The only down side to it is that you'll be with her for the entire two weeks. There will be no time for you to explore solo, and I can assure you that Thailand has many more delights than this one girl.

If that doesn't bother you, then fine, but I know it would gnaw at me.

[tourist]

Hi Gill, I belong to the wide bunch of farang who experienced great dissapointment after a long relationship with an LB who "loved" me so much.... made me feel unique etc etc . she dragged me into a masochistc game..
if you start dancing to their tune, some LB can really be dangerous. Such relationships have no future. Full stop!

However I feel something different in your story, and if I were in your shoes.... I 'd give it a try!

Go Gill... we live only once.. Carpe diem..!l
Just save you might need if/when the dream is gone...
you're a grown up person and I'm sure don't need further advice :-)

Just my 2 cents.. cheers

[Gilly123]

Hello

Again thanks for your input

Well 2 months after returning home there seems to be more contact from the girl,with the tone changing slightly,as far as staying with me for the 2 weeks i'm back in pattaya,after asking why ??? it seems the reason she gives is to want to get to know me more and she can't do that while she is working.. so i guess that is a fair answer

Yes i agree that if i say yes then as Spyder Rocket says i am stuck with her for the entire 2 Weeks,but it's 18 weeks till i arrive in pattaya and things could change by then,but if they don't then to be fair she has kept in touch every day,so i think i should give her a chance to see how it goes

It could be a big mistake (on my behalf) or it could work out ok,

Only time will tell

Once again thank you for all the input

[veveron]

Maybe spend the first week having fun and contact her in the second week if you still want to?

 

If she's emailing you every day that, at least, means you made an impression on her, what kind of impression I can't say of course. Personally I've never had one contact me daily, especially when they knew I was out of LOS, think I'd find it a little annoying actually.

[Gilly123]

Good evening everybody

Just a quick update if anybody may be interested....

all is the same regarding the LB in question,still emailing every day and plenty of photo attachments and english seems to have improved quite a lot !!!  only about 14 weeks till i return to LOS....However the tone of the mails has changed over the past week for some reason ???

With the latest ones containing the following quotes

" I am now missing you"

" You Begin to make me love you"

" i want to be with you"

 

Again i have not made any promises,there are no requests for any money,and i am very careful as to how i reply to these.... as to not give her any false ideas.so i'm not quite sure why there has been such a change in her mails..

Not enough to set any alarm bells at the moment but no doubt i will find out more on my return to LOS

any feedback on this or ideas welcome

Thank You

[dixon cox]

....However the tone of the mails has changed over the past week for some reason ???

With the latest ones containing the following quotes

" I am now missing you"

" You Begin to make me love you"

" i want to be with you"

 

Maybe she now has someone helping her with her emails or she's upping the anti.

 

I don't particularly enjoy having a cynical view on things as there are definitely times when it is unfounded. However, experience, not only my own, tends to lead me in a direction where I'd hedge my bets in a more negative direction. For all I know everything will be fine and dandy.

 

In general, Thais need a close eye kept upon them while you keep a closer eye on your wallet. As time passes and trust develops you can ease off. It is always wise to be cautious in regard to a potential love-affair between 1st and 3rd world persons.

 

Think of it as gambling; do not bet more than you can afford to lose. Thai girls are very adept at making you feel like you're holding all the aces, while all the time they're holding the trump card.

[Gilly123]

I Fully agree with what you say.. believe e i hold the wallet and nothing will be going to LOS.. and i will hold the Trump card... first sign of anything suspiscious and it's Goodbye !!!!

Maybe sounds a little harsh but that's the way it's gonna be... really i just want to be friends !!!  I'm not too sure if LBs can really be trusted, after some of the horror stories i have read... but only time will tell i guess

Thanks for you reply

[JustSumGai]

well, it's entirely possible in my book. Mine is a seamstress. Of very limited English skills. This would be a question to Gilly. How's her English? If it's good you gotta wonder how it got that way. If not, well, maybe she's tired of the bar work and thinking about opting out but in that case a long distance won't be easy. I was on Skype every day for a 7 months, often just watching her work. Finally got there and stayed with her at her shop. Also took her for a couple weeks to Cambodia. She does not ask for money. She's done virtually nothing but work (at shit pay for LONG hours) all her life as her only brother is a monk and you KNOW that ain't bringin Mom any cash.  So maybe you got a similar. I'd just say keep it in long term thinking. Don't expect much. I got good company, some fun and free digs while there. She's asked me for money twice. Once to help her move away from Pattaya (where she slugged away at having her own shop, initially keeping house for a cousin and her English hubby...after 13 yrs there she bailed to Udon and an aging Mom). That cost me 3000 baht. And recently I contributed to a rice planting. Another 3000. Big money big money haha. That's a couple long stays. if that.

   Sooooo, sure, it's possible but know that the odds are NOT in your favor. Act accordingly. If she's real she KNOWS the scams the other gitls pull. Maybe she's done them herself. But MAYBE she'd like to bail on that life. Personally I found Pattaya was a hole. I know my girl did not go into it much, she lived a half hour or so north of the sleeze area. Find out where her family is, talk about them. Try and find out what she SAYS is her dream for the future. In a couple more years she might see this as unobtainable and become a hardened pro. Know too that they have UNREALISTIC expectations and dreams MANY times.  The fact is this IS possible, if she, AND YOU, have your head screwed on right. Now I hate bar going mostly, and was looking for a nice spot to grow old(er). So what I found was good for me, but if you're even possibly gonna feel the need to raise some hell for a bit, ya might just keep her at a distance and  let the fun begin for a few years.

     I'd say give it a CAREFUL go.  But again, don't expect too much and DO NOT project your values and hopes into her. A lot of em have no real concept of love. The romantic love is a luxury to many there and so much so that it's a fairytale dream. WHICH occasionally they like to live out with a nice guy...until it blows up in both faces.