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My First Trip to LoS
#1
Posted 24 December 2014 - 10:34 AM
For the past several months, this forum has been my sacred document and primary source of information for my trip to Thailand. Now that I am on the ground, I wanted to document my experiences for future visitors and curious onlookers to use. I will include my LB activities as well as some others, since I find the systems are similar, even though the equipment is not. I will try to update a bit each day while it is still fresh in my memory.
One word of caution, there will be no photos. I have my reasons. I hope you understand.
Enjoy.
- Civ
#2
Posted 24 December 2014 - 12:25 PM
I arrived in the afternoon exhausted from a long series of flights and layovers.
Tip 1: (if you can afford it) Don't be a cheapskate like me and put some thought into your travel itinerary.
I went the cheapest route and paid for it by losing a day of vacation and showing up a hollowed out shell of a man. Uncomfortable red-eyes, long layovers, extremely short layovers, and bizarre fellow passengers led to nearly two days of sleeplessness.
Once I disembarked at DMK, that warm air hit me and I felt a lot better. I got to the hotel, took a quick nap, and went exploring.
Tip 2: The Aspen Suites on Sukhumvit Soi 2 are nice, clean, affordable, and one block from Nana plaza. So far, I recommend it.
After eating some Thailand McDonalds, which is tradition when I arrive in other countries. While there was still daylight, I walked up and down Soi 4 (Nana), then down to Soi 20 or so, then returned.
Tip 3: I always walk the local perimeter to get a feel of what is available. When it comes to getting your bearings it is much better than looking at a map.
I felt a lot more comfortable after exploring, went back to the hotel, showered up, watched 'Olympus Has Fallen' then headed out. This break got me fresh and clean as well as giving the party to get started in the neighborhood. I was also debating on which venues to visit. After reviewing my notes (from this website) I decided to check out Nana Entertainment Plaza.
Tip 4: Do your homework. Study maps, familiarize yourself with locations, and reviews before you arrive.
I walked up and down Soi 4 and then walked each floor of Nana, seeing places familiar to me, even though it was my first visit. Let me confirm what has been posted here before... it is amazing. Prepare yourself if you are like me and prone to sensory overload. I found the girls outside each bar to be sexy, friendly, and making it difficult for me to keep walking to the next place.
Tip 5: After following Tip 4 above, don't bother making specific plans. Learn what is available, then browse around until you find out what matches what you happen to be in the mood for.
I was in the mood for some strong ladyboy action. So, I ended up at Charades, formerly Cascades. There was a girl outside named Bee (?). It was pretty noisy, but I believe she pronounced it Bee-ya. I was a bit confused. Why would they let a non-LB girl work the front of a famous LB establishment? She met me outside the door and I willingly followed her inside.
It was tough not letting all my coaching (again, from this website) and James Bond-esque backstory slip away. I tried my best to play it cool, but probably failed miserably in this department. I entered, looked at the girls inside, then ran back out to double check the sign on the door. Yeah, this was Charades. I was confused for a moment because the girls were very beautiful and (don't laugh)... I think passable.
Tip 6: People's opinions should be taken as just that...opinions. Even the photos here are unintentionally misleading. Girls seen in photos here are so much better looking in person.
You've heard of a kid in a candy store? Honestly, I would have taken the roughest looking one home with great pleasure. I can confirm that these girls are taller and leggy-er. Bee took me to some stadium style seating and we started to chat. She asked if I wanted s drink and would I buy her one. She introduces me to the Mamasan, but with all the noise I couldn't make out the name. I bought myself, Bee, and Mamasan drinks. I paid 120 baht each. I didn't feel like negotiating. It's like $3.50 each. Sorry, brothers. Mamasan hung around for a bit with Bee and me and they attempted to make a little conversation. I thought it was funny they kept asking if I liked their King. I was wondering who that guy was pictured all over town. I was calling him Thai George Bush in my mind. When you see him, you will know. They wanted me to know that they loved him. I told them I loved him too. I was a little worried about my answer, but it turned out to be the right one, I suppose.
Mamasan leaves and Bee tells me that she cannot be barfined and can only work the door. At this point I'm not entirely sure that she is a LB. Sorry, I'm such a newb. I say, "aww" then let her know that I'm ok with that and thank her for bringing me in. Mamasan comes by and says something to her and suddenly she has a change of heart. She tells me she can sit with me for a few more minutes. Bee is very hot, so I really don't mind. I really want her, regardless of what gear she's packed. (See tip 5). I tell her that all of the girls on stage, 12 or so of them, were all very beautiful and I can't believe they were all LB's. She says something like, us Thai ladyboys are the best in the world. In my mind I'm thinking how much is it going to cost me to barfine her. The girls on stage, who were kind of milling about instead of dancing, were invisible to me now. I want Bee's honey.
I'm like, fuck it. Let's do this. Keep in mind that I have never been to Thailand, much less been with the third gender. I'm nervous. I'm sweaty. James Bond has left the building. I tell her that it's too bad I can't barfine her. She goes and talks to the Mamasan and comes back with some good news. Suddenly, she CAN be barfined. At this point I know I have probably fallen into a ruse about her being 'just a door girl', but I didn't care, and still don't.
The barfine was 700 and her end was 2000 for 2 hours. I know I overpaid, but again, I didn't feel like fighting that battle. Besides, Bee was stunning. I consider it a very worthwhile expenditure. I decide to use the short time room on the same floor, another 300 baht.
Tip 7: If you are worried about procedure, comfort, or people staring, don't be. These people have a system and have been doing it since long before you arrived and long after you leave.
The short time room was good enough, with a shower, bum hose, etc. Bee had changed into a nurse's outfit. We did everything I wanted and had fantasized about for so long. Bee was exceptional. My only complaint was after an hour or so, she was obviously trying to wrap things up. At one point I said 'oww' and she thought I said 'ohh' and she started landing procedures, so to speak, prematurely. I could tell she was ready to go, so I kicked it into high gear and finished up. I wasn't really upset, because I know she's working, but I don't like being rushed.
So, for breaking my LB cherry, with no negotiating and a huge neon sign that said 'newb', I paid around 3500 baht, including s few tips. Please don't bother flaming this post for overpaying. I had a blast for pennies on the dollar.
The post-coitus was another 15 minutes of showering, dressing, and chatting. She tells me that on Dec. 24 and 25 the girls are only charging 1000 baht, plus barfines, drinks, etc. I think I said something like 'mama mia!'.
While walking out and planning tonight's revisit, a powerful hunger came over me. This time for food. I stopped by the Nana burger stand on the way out and had one of the best, most well-deserved, hamburgers ever. If I went right now for another burger, it would probably suck. However, right then, after checking a huge box on my bucket list, I was in heaven.
Walking around a bit towards my hotel, covered in eau'd ladyboy and face down in a double cheeseburger, I was handed a few fliers about Christmas parties around the 'hood starting tonight. I may never leave this place.
I hear there are palaces and elephants and shit to see here. Fuck the whole lot of them. Just kidding, I'm about to go right now.
Tip 8: You got to go see the tourist traps. You don't want to go home and have nothing to show for it but a huge smile and empty pockets, brother.
Day 1 in the books. Time to start day 2.
- dixon cox, jaybee111, Christopheje and 4 others like this
#3
Posted 24 December 2014 - 08:34 PM
Good first night story civlor! Looking forward to hearing about the rest of your journey.
#4
Posted 25 December 2014 - 02:52 PM
#5
Posted 25 December 2014 - 07:17 PM
Sadly, Bangkok Belly set in with a vengeance. I slept in late and didn't venture out until I felt a bit better. I believe the daily dose of yogurt helped get me through it and shortened my recovery.
Tip: Check this site for the post about staying healthy whilst traveling. Very useful.
That evening, I went walking down Sukhumvit and ended up at a massage parlor that specializes in Nuru massages. Again, I could have headed straight to a LB venue, but I happened to be curious about the whole Nuru experience. In retrospect, I should have done just that.
There's a patio area out front where there are girls smoking and texting. I walk up and they invite me into the area just inside, past the patio. In front of me is a neat, well lit bar and 12 girls behind me. Suddenly, the bartender slides a partition and closes me off from the bar. It wasn't a slam, but it was close. Then I realize the girls closed the door behind me. I always think I'm going to be attacked by vampires or have my organs harvested, so I start planning my exit strategy. I sit down on one of the couches so the girls will sit down as well. I think I can take them down if I have to, except the big one, maybe.
The Mamasan sits down next to me and tells me the details. 2000 baht, inclusive pricing. That gets me to stay a bit longer. Then, I spot one girl that is ultra yummy. Overall, the others were not making me want to stay, but she had me hooked. I asked for a drink and the Mamasan said she would bring it to the room. So, no chilling or chatting at this place. It must happen on the outside patio, or not at all.
I was determined to get the Nuru experience, so I paid and took number 9 upstairs. We showered each other, which was nice because she had a fantastic body. She tells me to lay down on the mat which was the second coldest thing ever to touch my skin. I am shivering and started slipping into hypothermia. She sprays warm water on me and I regain the will to live. Then she squirts the Nuru gel all over me, which was the first coldest thing ever. I feel my balls shoot up inside me, nearly to my throat.
After we gained a shared understanding about core body temperature, the actual Nuru began. It was great. Everyone should try it once. Once. The good news was it was pretty much inclusive, so whatever I asked for was ok and she was more than willing. However, I kept thinking about how awesome this would be with a LB with a nice set of equipment.
In the end, it was a lot of work to reach the ultimate goal. It was somewhat relaxing, but you would be better served getting a legit massage, then heading to see your favorite LB.
Feeling pretty satisfied, I grabbed some groceries, another Nuru burger, then headed back to the hotel. If I felt like another go, then I knew where to go. I didn't.
The next morning I got up for a tour of the palace and whatnot. It was great. Free ride, free tour guide. I just had to pay my entry fee to the area. It was a good perk provided by the hotel...or so I thought. At the end of the tour, the guide says we are stopping to get some good souvenirs. Everyone in the van is ok with it, and I didn't want to pay for a cab home. It turns out we were going to some sort of high end gold and gem merchant. This 'quick stop' turned into a hour and a half tourist trap. They even had us sit in a small theater and watch a ten minute promotional video about how cool Thai gold and gems are. Remember when people would try to sell time shares? Fuck, I don't even wear a watch, much less jewelry.
Tip: Nothing is free. Even if you are skeptical and observant, they may slip one past you. Keep your eyes open.
Eventually I got back to home base. Mistakes were made. Mistakes I do not plan on repeating. Time for my Christmas present to myself. More to come tomorrow.
-Civ
- jaybee111 likes this
#6
Posted 25 December 2014 - 07:24 PM
#7
Posted 26 December 2014 - 01:33 AM
So, I decided to return to Charades since I had such a good time on day 1. Tonight was much, much different. They had many more girls on stage and walking about. One nice girl took me inside and sat down next to me. We were then joined by another girl and both Mamasans. The two girls start arguing across me in Thai while the Mamasan was pumping me for drinks and tips. This was the moment I should have bailed. Long story short, I tell girls what I want, which eliminated both of them from contention. Girl 1 tells me her friend can accommodate what I requested, so she comes over. Girl 3 sits down and we start to chat.
Mamasan asks me if I want both, and I reply no, just girl 3. Then these two girls start arguing across me in Thai. I tell the Mamasan and girl 3 that I want to get this show on the road. After thinking I've paid both the barfine and the girl's fee, girl 3 and I have a lot of fun in the short time room.
To make matters worse, the 'Christmas special' I heard about on Tuesday night, "1000 baht for girls" was referring to the barfine. Considering that was more than I paid on Tuesday, I was a bit confused, to say the least. Back to the Mamasan we go to clear things up. Of course once it was cleared up, I was relieved of some more baht.
The whole thing left a bad taste in my mouth, pun intended. I know I screwed up, but man what a rough evening. I am a slow learner, but I will keep at it. Just need to keep in mind that I am swimming with sharks.
-Civ
- jaybee111 likes this
#8
Posted 26 December 2014 - 07:09 AM
Oh yes...the Christmas barfines.... just as silly as the newyear barfines...but you have to look at that from the barowners point of wiev as well...if they dont demand a high barfine...they cant make an deduction from the girls salary if she no shows up to Work...i know it sounds funny...but that is thai-business
Even i think that its great fun to visit Nana Plaza...i must admit iam more of a " Check-in bar" guy...and also a great admirer of Cookatoo bar and darkside bar...all of those have one thing in common...if not owned then influxed by a farang with our way of thinking
A ladyboy is a kind of creature...that makes a txt saying...dont you trust me...and send it to 20 people...
#9
Posted 26 December 2014 - 07:19 AM
obviously you did not read the bible enough. Try the sidewalk bar around the corner from Nana. They setup around 11pm. NO barfine. 700 is ridiculous. You can get a short time for that in Pattaya, and sometimes in Bkk. Those girls might go with you for 1000. Short time rooms down a lil alley across from the Rajah hotel lot as I recall. Look for signs like White Orchid, etc. Actually Da Bed has a nice room with a balcony for 700 as I recall and that's right in the thick of it almost. You can also find a pretty nice room in the short time room places for daily rate. Dunno, might be TOO much in the thick of it. Ya got Darkside on your research list? Up at Phnom Prong or some such (skytrain station). Very good street food at the next stop up, Thong Lor. Soi 38. Best one is one you walk down a few steps to the inside dining area. You can't go wrong with ANY of their meals, tho the cashew chicken is a fav of many ppl. If they sell out early, they might close around 9pm. That's how good they are, fulla locals almost non stop at night. Almost any place on that block is good.
Run down to Saphan Taksin skytrain at the river (change to river line at Siam parago station) and ask around for a taxi boat. Nonthaburi will take you there, end of line, very good market near the boat drop off, walk away from river and look right to see awnings covering sidewalk til ya see an arch of sorts and enter. Lots of real local stuff and better prices. This gives you a real good look at Bkk without walkin yer feet off, both sides of the river. ALSO you can hit Wat Arun from the river and the Grand Palace. Riverboats stop running at 7pm. Cost to make the long haul to Nonthaburi (MAYBE an hour, more like 45 mins I think) was 18 baht last time I went. So LOTS of photo ops on the way there, shot to your right, hit the market (I got a real nice cotton button down shirt for 100 baht there, wish I'd bought a couple more) then back on the boat and shoot right again for opposite side pics. You CAN do all that in a day if you start early. Also there's a little island with Mon ppl on it that you can bike around, but I dunno how much time you have. This trip starting early AM would maximize sights and experiences. Minimal outlay of baht unless ya go nutso on buyin stuff. DO NOT believe any ass that tells you Grand Palace is closed. I woulda thought all yer reading woulda hipped you to the gold shop scam. Tho I do know a few folks that'll go thru it as a lark just for the free ride and extra sights on the runaround.
Remember, be leery of the TOO HELPFUL ppl. Grain of salt thang.
- batman4ever likes this
#10
Posted 26 December 2014 - 11:53 AM
civlor, great read so far, and I'm sure it brings back memories of other board members' first time visit to LOS as well.
As for making mistakes, that's part of life, and while it's better to avoid them, there's still nothing like experiencing it first hand and if you're not significantly disadvantaged, you will be better able to avoid future scams/problems.
As for not posting photos - totally understandable. It's really unfortunate there are some yahoos that get kicks out of showing the lbs others have posted, or thinking that somehow it gives them an advantage when talking with an lb. These guys need to understand that their actions are causing the death of the the photo packed trip reports and trip reports in general.
Looking forward to reading more of your first time trip, and glad that this forum helped you!
#11
Posted 26 December 2014 - 03:26 PM
how can simply posting a pic of the girl in a bar or on the street at a food vendor be of destructive value? or just pics of sights he found interesting. I'm not sure how any guy would get points saying some nickname took this pic of you at the bar you work at. Gasp. Ain't it more like the in loom nekkie pics that have stirred it up in the past? Just curious.
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